Why can't we just be happy?
Be happy: 20 tips for more happiness + joie de vivre
To be happy, to enjoy more zest for life - that's what many want. It is not for nothing that many wisdoms, sayings and philosophers deal with it. But how can we be happy - especially when circumstances prevent it? The first step: make up your mind! Happiness is not a stroke of luck, but first and foremost a question of thought and attitude. Here we show you numerous simple ways to be happy ...
➠ Content: This is what awaits you
➠ Content: This is what awaits you
Be happy - how does it work?
Being happy doesn't mean walking around the clock with a smile on your face 24/7. You can be basically happy and still have a bad day. Happiness is less dependent on circumstances. Health, good relationships, personal freedom and a fulfilling job make us happy. But they are not a mandatory requirement.
Numerous studies show that wealth, status, power and material prosperity hardly play a role in our sense of happiness. Our inner attitude is decisive. Your own happiness grows from it. Even the writer Nicolas Chamfort recognized: “It is difficult to look for happiness in us. But it is quite impossible to find it anywhere else. "
Being happy is a choice. The sociologist Ruut Veenhoven from the Erasmus University Rotterdam is considered a luminary in the field of happiness research. He is convinced: Happiness is the degree to which a person is overall satisfied with their life. ”Or to put it another way: It depends on how we judge things ourselves. Even strokes of fate and serious accidents with dramatic consequences do not have to make people unhappy. Quite a few experience the proverbial happiness in bad luck. It's all a question of perspective.
You could also say: the sum has to be right.
If you have bad luck, you can easily put it away as long as the many small moments of happiness prevail. Not as a permanent condition, but in total. And you can take care of that yourself - through your thinking and the following tips and exercises with which you can promote "being happy".
20 simple tips and exercises for more zest for life
Being happy does not mean having the best of everything, but rather making the best of everything! You decide that you want to be happy. Here are the appropriate measures:
Be more grateful
Gratitude is an essential key to satisfaction and happiness. Because we do not look at deficits (which we do not have), but learn to enjoy what we have long had - and what is often not taken for granted.
Happiness is a matter of focusing. It is often the little things that make us happy: a colleague's joke, the affectionate message from our partner ... Notice this consciously - and write it down. As you become more aware of these things, you will become happier.
Write a lucky diary
Anyone who struggles with the first two points should note down their numerous little happy moments and record them - in a luck diary. Not only does it make you remember it better. Reading in it makes you happy even years later and conjures up many wonderful memories.
Use your free time to breathe deeply and to regenerate. Meet friends. Do what you feel like doing. Eat nice, play games or work on your own business. By regularly taking time for yourself, you reduce stress and maximize the joy of life.
Stress is a real happiness killer. It dampens all positive feelings. But you cannot be happy without peace of mind. You should therefore reduce acute stress - through relaxation exercises such as yoga or meditation.
Get some exercise
Just a 20-minute walk sends your thoughts on a journey, relaxing and making you happy. Make sure you incorporate enough exercise into your everyday life. Those who do not like walks can do sports. Swimming, for example. This strengthens the immune system. At the same time, happiness hormones are released.
The sensual experience of nature has been shown to have a calming effect. Those who are mindful of their surroundings have less opportunity to worry or brood about future things. The sun on your skin, the smell of freshly mown grass in your nose - life in the here and now. That makes you happy!
Happy people smile. The same also applies the other way round: Smiling people are happy! Even they have no reason to. Studies show that even an artificial smile triggers feelings of happiness. Reason: When we twist our mouths into a smile, we send signals to our brain. That in turn interprets it like this: We smile, so we have to be happy. It promptly releases hormones such as dopamine, serotonin and norepinephrine.
You can't be happy and angry or resentful at the same time. People make mistakes. Learn to forgive and to forgive - also to yourself. By letting go, you not only gain freedom, but also more moments of happiness.
Avoid toxic people
There are people with an infectious character. In everything they see the negative, blaspheme, pull others down (to themselves). Toxic people. Avoid them whenever you can! These guys drag everyone around them into the abyss. Better to get close to happy people and realistic optimists. They are also contagious - upwards.
Reduce negative news
Of course, you should continue to be informed. But filter more: Too many negative headlines, too much social media consumption that only illustrates illusory worlds - that makes you unhappy. You can often be happy if you only consume messages in dosed form.
Do you say "no" more often
Everyone likes yes-sayers. But they like to be exploited. Whoever wants to be happy has to know what is good for him or her - and what is not. In the second case, you need to learn to say no. Don't fall into the courtesy trap and show your mental strength. Your needs are no less important! Saying no can trigger tremendous feelings of happiness.
Get enough sleep
Sounds banal, but it isn't: Healthy sleep is a great factor in happiness. According to sleep researchers, adults need around 7 hours of sleep a day. Less harms the psyche and health. Maintain relaxing evening routines and do not work against your biorhythm.
Pay attention to your posture
Our posture doesn't just reflect how we feel. We can also (positively) influence our feelings with it. The effect is called biofeedback in technical terms. By standing upright, shoulders straight, chest and stomach slightly taut, you improve your (self-confident) effect on others - and lift your mood.
“I could dance with happiness!” - It's not just a saying. It's true: dancing makes you happy (and smarter). Numerous messenger substances are released that make you happy and improve your mood. The dance style doesn't matter. So if you need a lucky kick: turn on your favorite music and dance to it!
Everyone has different expectations of themselves and their environment. This reflects our values and wishes. But if we set this too high and unrealistic, we can only be disappointed. A real lucky killer. You can continue to set high goals - but also achievable ones, please.
Stay true to yourself
In order to meet other people's expectations, you may have to bend over and show behavior that does not suit you. On the other hand, if you live up to your own expectations, stay true to yourself and remain authentic. Have the courage to stand by yourself. This has been proven to make you happier.
Accept and love yourself
Self-love and self-acceptance are two important keys to happiness. No one can be happy who is at enmity with himself. Far too often we judge ourselves too harshly. There is also an evaluation here - that of one's own person. That can also be changed.
Give with happiness
Giving is actually more blissful than receiving. Some time ago, Harvard Professor Michael Norton stated: “Anyone who gives something to other people creates a special connection with them. It's good for your own happiness. ”In addition, gestures of giving are always an inspiration that we admire and imitate. That makes others happy too.
You don't have to do all of the tips and exercises at once. But remember why you searched for and clicked on this article. Happiness doesn't start in the future, but now. If you want to be happy, you have to start now. Not tomorrow. So pick a tip or two from the list - and get started. It is worth it!
The 5 stages of happiness
Defining happiness as a final state is making a mistake. “Happiness” or “becoming happy” is a process we go through. However, at different times, in different speeds and phases of happiness. Means: Those who are less happy may only be in a special phase and approach happiness again later ...
In the beginning there is the search. As with "Mr. Rossi is looking for happiness". This phase is classic among teenagers and young adults who are looking for their own way. We all want to find out what makes us happy. We need goals - and an idea of our own needs. This phase is often perceived as exhausting and accompanied by a lot of uncertainty. We mess around, feel disoriented, sometimes powerless. Until there is a clear goal in the end.
The pursuit of happiness is trying to achieve our goals. For some it is professional success, for others financial freedom, for others it is great love. All of this takes time. And can be associated with setbacks. Nevertheless, these goals give meaning to our actions. We know why we are striving for what and where. That alone makes you happy.
In the third phase of happiness, the focus changes. It is no longer about achieving more, but rather creating a lasting balance. In this phase we try to maintain our (so far) achieved happiness. Many try to cover themselves and forge pension plans that are supposed to preserve the balance.
Those who have found the balance look for meaning. The next step is to find meaning in what we do: does our job really help people? Does what we do make the world a better place? Such questions are typical for this phase of happiness. The more meaning we see in our actions and decisions, the greater the happiness we feel.
The last phase is the highest level of happiness: the most important goals are identified and achieved. The equilibrium is established and secured. And we see a (valuable) meaning in everything. What remains is pure joy. We can sit back and enjoy happiness. However, this phase is not a permanent one. At some point the cycle starts all over again. We become dissatisfied and look for new challenges and goals.
So please never put yourself under pressurewhen you are not that happy right now. There is no such thing as a fulfilled life combined with lasting, desireless happiness. It's not even worth striving for. Only through the opposites and contrasts do we experience and intensify our “happiness”.
25 more tips on how to be happy
You can also benefit from our free tips and checklists to download:
Jochen Mai is the founder and editor-in-chief of the career bible. The author of several books lectures at the TH Köln and is a sought-after keynote speaker, coach and consultant.
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